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Well that's the legal stuff sorted.

Should you decline to comply with this warning, a leather winged demon of the night will soar from the deep malevolent caverns of the white peak into the shadowy moonlit sky and, with a thirst for blood on its salivating fangs, search the very threads of time for the throbbing of your heartbeat. Just thought you'd want to know that.

 

Breaking News from telegraph.co.uk


Fri, 02 May 2008 20:34:00 GMT
London Mayor election result

The table below shows the final results of the London Mayor election which saw Boris Johnson force out Ken Livingstone.
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Fri, 02 May 2008 12:42:00 GMT
Local elections 2008: London Assembly Elections

Voters in England and Wales yesterday cast their ballots in elections to more than 150 councils, the first electoral test of Gordon Brown’s premiership.
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Fri, 02 May 2008 20:34:00 GMT
London election: Assembly results

As well as chosing their candidate for London mayor, residents of the capital yesterday elected representatives for the London assembly.
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Thu, 01 May 2008 18:18:00 GMT
Local elections 2008: Welsh results in full

Voters in England and Wales yesterday cast their ballots in elections to more than 150 councils, the first electoral test of Gordon Brown’s premiership.
view the full story


Fri, 02 May 2008 18:12:00 GMT
Local elections 2008: England

Voters in England and Wales yesterday cast their ballots in elections to more than 150 councils, the first electoral test of Gordon Brown’s premiership.
view the full story


Fri, 02 May 2008 16:12:00 GMT
Local elections 2008: England

Voters in England and Wales yesterday cast their ballots in elections to more than 150 councils, the first electoral test of Gordon Brown’s premiership.
view the full story


Thu, 01 May 2008 15:58:00 GMT
Local elections 2008: Welsh results in full

Voters in England and Wales yesterday cast their ballots in elections to more than 150 councils, the first electoral test of Gordon Brown’s premiership.
view the full story


Fri, 02 May 2008 15:50:00 GMT
Local elections 2008: England

Voters in England and Wales yesterday cast their ballots in elections to more than 150 councils, the first electoral test of Gordon Brown’s premiership.
view the full story


Thu, 01 May 2008 03:28:00 GMT
Local elections 2008: Welsh results in full

Voters in England and Wales yesterday cast their ballots in elections to more than 150 councils, the first electoral test of Gordon Brown’s premiership.
view the full story


Fri, 02 May 2008 14:50:00 GMT
Local elections 2008: England

Voters in England and Wales yesterday cast their ballots in elections to more than 150 councils, the first electoral test of Gordon Brown’s premiership.
view the full story


Fri, 02 May 2008 13:40:00 GMT
Local elections 2008: England

Voters in England and Wales yesterday cast their ballots in elections to more than 150 councils, the first electoral test of Gordon Brown’s premiership.
view the full story


Fri, 02 May 2008 17:34:00 GMT
Local elections 2008: Results from key councils

Voters in England and Wales yesterday cast their ballots in elections to more than 150 councils, the first electoral test of Gordon Brown’s premiership.
view the full story


Fri, 02 May 2008 13:40:00 GMT
Local elections 2008: England

Voters in England and Wales yesterday cast their ballots in elections to more than 150 councils, the first electoral test of Gordon Brown’s premiership.
view the full story


Fri, 02 May 2008 02:20:00 GMT
Local elections 2008: English results in full

Voters in England and Wales yesterday cast their ballots in elections to more than 150 councils, the first electoral test of Gordon Brown’s premiership.
view the full story


Fri, 02 May 2008 01:10:00 GMT
Local elections 2008: English results in full

Voters in England and Wales yesterday cast their ballots in elections to more than 150 councils, the first electoral test of Gordon Brown’s premiership.
view the full story


Fri, 02 May 2008 01:10:00 GMT
Local elections 2008: English results in full

Voters in England and Wales yesterday cast their ballots in elections to more than 150 councils, the first electoral test of Gordon Brown’s premiership.
view the full story


Fri, 02 May 2008 00:49:00 GMT
Local elections 2008: English results in full

Voters in England and Wales yesterday cast their ballots in elections to more than 150 councils, the first electoral test of Gordon Brown’s premiership.
view the full story


Fri, 02 May 2008 00:56:00 GMT
Local elections 2008: Results from key councils

Voters in England and Wales yesterday cast their ballots in elections to more than 150 councils, the first electoral test of Gordon Brown’s premiership.
view the full story


Thu, 01 May 2008 03:28:00 GMT
Local elections 2008: Welsh results in full

Voters in England and Wales yesterday cast their ballots in elections to more than 150 councils, the first electoral test of Gordon Brown’s premiership.
view the full story


Thu, 01 May 2008 23:46:00 GMT
Local elections 2008: English results in full

Voters in England and Wales yesterday cast their ballots in elections to more than 150 councils, the first electoral test of Gordon Brown’s premiership.
view the full story


Thu, 01 May 2008 00:01:00 GMT
New address for Telegraph RSS feeds

The Telegraph has just made a major upgrade to its web delivery platform and now has new addresses for News RSS feeds. The new feeds are: All News - http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/rss; Top News - http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/majornews/rss; UK News - http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/rss; World News - http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/rss. Alternatively go to www.telegraph.co.uk/rss for a complete list.
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Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:31:00 GMT
DNA confirms Austrian man's dungeon incest

DNA test results have confirmed that an Austrian man who locked up his daughter for 24 years in a windowless cellar is the father of her six children.
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Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:19:00 GMT
Kate McCann's mother 'wanted to shake her' for leaving Madeleine

Kate McCann’s mother wanted to shake her daughter and son-in-law for leaving Madeleine on her own the night she went missing, she has said.
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Tue, 29 Apr 2008 00:01:00 GMT
Tariq Aziz on trial over rice merchants' killing

Tariq Aziz, Saddam Hussein's mouthpiece to the world, will tomorrow face charges for crimes against humanity when he goes on trial in Baghdad.
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Tue, 29 Apr 2008 14:30:00 GMT
Oil firms announce record profits as petrol nears £5 gallon

Oil companies have been accused of ripping off motorists as they announced record profits on the day petrol crept towards the £5 gallon for the first time.
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Mon, 28 Apr 2008 13:31:00 GMT
Austrian incest dungeon victims reunited with family

The victims of Austria’s "house of horrors" have been emotionally reunited with the rest of their family.
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Tue, 29 Apr 2008 00:01:00 GMT
Barack Obama's pastor Jeremiah Wright resurfaces to reignite race row

Barack Obama's former pastor returned to plague his White House bid yesterday with a nationally televised speech in which he blamed US policy for the September 11 attacks and praised the controversial black leader Louis Farrakhan.
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Tue, 29 Apr 2008 10:13:00 GMT
Ronaldo 'threatened transvestites in Rio motel room'

Brazilian police are investigating allegations by three transvestites that Ronaldo, the Brazilian football star and AC Milan forward, threatened to harm them after he took them to a Rio de Janeiro motel.
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Tue, 29 Apr 2008 08:30:00 GMT
Gordon Brown to make cannabis class B drug

Gordon Brown has given his strongest indication yet today that he plans to defy his own high-powered group of experts and plough ahead with plans to reclassify cannabis as a class B drug.
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Tue, 29 Apr 2008 00:01:00 GMT
PG Tips and Coca-Cola among 100 household brands investigated over price-fixing

About 100 leading household brands, including PG Tips, Coca-Cola and Aquafresh, are at the centre of an investigation into allegations of price-fixing, The Daily Telegraph can disclose.
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Tue, 29 Apr 2008 00:01:00 GMT
Petrol hits £5 gallon after Grangemouth strike

Oil refinery workers in Grangemouth ended their 48-hour strike early this morning but the dispute over pension plans that caused it remains unresolved.
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Mon, 28 Apr 2008 00:01:00 GMT
UK faces six weeks of record petrol price rises

Britain faces six weeks of record petrol price rises in the wake of the Grangemouth oil refinery strike, trade experts have warned.
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Mon, 28 Apr 2008 21:57:00 GMT
Commentary: Austrian 'incest' dungeon case

To abuse your daughter when she turns 11 is horrible enough, but what Elisabeth Fritzl's father is alleged to have done to her is a crime against the soul, says psychologist Phillip Hodson.
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Mon, 28 Apr 2008 11:42:00 GMT
Secrets of Austrian 'incest' dungeon exposed

The secrets of Austria’s "house of horrors" have been revealed to the world as a retired engineer confessed to keeping his daughter locked up in a cellar for 24 years and allegedly fathering seven children by her.
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Mon, 28 Apr 2008 09:30:00 GMT
UN 'covered up Congo peacekeeper corruption'

The United Nations covered up evidence that peacekeeping troops were involved in smuggling gold and ivory and trading arms with rebel fighters in the Democratic Republic of Congo, it has been claimed.
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Mon, 28 Apr 2008 08:27:00 GMT
Kate McCann 'feels she let Madeleine down'

The grandmother of Madeleine McCann told yesterday how Kate McCann feels she “let her daughter down” by leaving her in an unlocked apartment on the night she vanished.
view the full story


Mon, 28 Apr 2008 11:42:00 GMT
Austrian woman's incest and dungeon ordeal an 'unfathomable crime'

The full horror of the Austrian dungeon where a woman was allegedly held captive by her father for 24 years was revealed today.
view the full story


Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:57:00 GMT
Timeline of the Austrian incest case

An Austrian man has confessed toimprisoning his daughter in a secret dungeon for 24 years and fathering her seven children, in an extraordinary case that has shocked the country.
view the full story


Mon, 28 Apr 2008 09:30:00 GMT
China train crash kills more than 70

At least 66 people have been killed and hundreds injured after two passenger trains derailed and tumbled into a ditch after colliding in eastern China.
view the full story


Mon, 28 Apr 2008 11:42:00 GMT
Austrian woman's ordeal: First pictures of father and secret dungeon

An Austrian man has confessed toimprisoning his daughter in a secret dungeon for 24 years and fathering her seven children, in an extraordinary case that has shocked the country.
view the full story


Mon, 28 Apr 2008 11:14:00 GMT
Father 'admits jailing and abusing Austrian woman in secret dungeon'

An Austrian man has admitted imprisoning his daughter in an underground dungeon for 24 years and fathering all seven of her children, it was reported today.
view the full story


Mon, 28 Apr 2008 08:27:00 GMT
McCann twins search house for Madeleine

Sean and Amelie McCann still search the house for their missing sister Madeleine one year after her disappearance, their mother Kate has disclosed.
view the full story


Mon, 28 Apr 2008 09:30:00 GMT
Dozens dead in China train crash

At least 66 people have been killed and hundreds injured after two passenger trains derailed and tumbled into a ditch after colliding in eastern China.
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Thu, 24 Apr 2008 18:44:00 GMT
Bank customers could win £1bn refund in charges battle

Bank customers could be in line for a £1 billion refund after a significant ruling in the High Court over unfair charges.
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Thu, 24 Apr 2008 08:51:00 GMT
North Korea accused of helping Syria to build a nuclear reactor

The CIA believes North Korea shared expertise with Syria that assisted in the creation of a nuclear reactor, according to reports in Washington.
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Thu, 24 Apr 2008 17:15:00 GMT
Teachers threaten more strikes as pupils suffer

Teachers have threatened further industrial action as a national strike hit up to 9,500 schools across England and Wales on Thursday.
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Thu, 24 Apr 2008 12:29:00 GMT
Madeleine police accused of hypocrisy by friend of the McCanns

One of the friends of Kate and Gerry McCann who dined with them on the night their daughter Madeleine disappeared has accused Portuguese police of "outrageous" hypocrisy.
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Thu, 24 Apr 2008 19:13:00 GMT
Disabled man 'dead in suitcase for weeks'

The body of a missing disabled man could have lain undiscovered in a suitcase in the back garden of the family home for several weeks, it has emerged.
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Thu, 24 Apr 2008 15:52:00 GMT
James Bond filming suspended after third accident leaves stuntman in coma

Filming on the new James Bond film in Italy has been suspended after three accidents hit the "cursed" production in five days.
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Thu, 24 Apr 2008 10:51:00 GMT
Consumers win round one of bank charges battle

Anti-terrorist asset-freezing orders introduced during Gordon Brown's spell as Chancellor are legally flawed because Parliament was "bypassed", the High Court ruled today.
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